Spring is officially here, and it seems like the perfect time to refresh. Lately, I have been thinking a lot about happiness (probably because I am reading Gretchen Rubin's The Happiness Project). Along with my thinking, I have been reflecting on what I am doing in my own life to experience happiness and to (hopefully) create happiness with the people I hold dear. My Happiness Project has also got me thinking a lot...
Looking at my goals for March, I realized that I am not tackling my happiness project in the right way for me. I am learning that there are certain personality traits that I identified myself as having, but those traits are not actually the true me. This realization brings me equal amounts of both excitement and terror.
I have always thought of myself as a serious planner and rule follower. But I have learned that when I overplan and when I am overly specific, I create a lot of pressure on myself to carry out something that is often unrealistic and unattainable. The end result is a version of myself that is rigid, inflexible, and super stressed. I don't like this version of myself. This is not the person I was meant to be. After all, if I was truly this type of person, I would never be late for anything and procrastination would be unheard of. The truth is (whether I like it or not), I am almost always late and procrastination might as well be my middle name. And why do I procrastinate? Because I set my expectations so damn high that the task becomes this daunting mountain to climb, and it take me forever to muster up the motivation to get started.
With these overly specific and detailed plans, I get this picture in my mind of how things are supposed to go, and I close myself off to the possibility of life unfolding in a completely unpredictable but beautiful way. Yet, when I do let my guard down and give in to spontaneity, I end up having so much fun, and many times, I am left with some of my favorite memories.
For me, this blog started to feel rigid. My Happiness Project was creating stress for me to follow. Yes, I did create some good habits, but then my overly specific expectations began to wear on me. I also found myself barely posting because I was spending my time planning what to write, and so it was hard to find the time to actually write. This blog was created with the intention of living curiously. Overplanning and living curiously are not really a good match. I want this blog to be more fun...a place where I learn and grow and laugh.
So, here I go again. I am recreating My Happiness Project (and maybe this blog too). As I have said before, I want this to be more about play than an obligatory checklist. I recently read something where the author described her journaling as soulless. This is exactly how I feel about my writing and about how I have been living. Too much structure can make tasks - and even life - robotic, and that does not bring me happiness.
Below are some guiding ideas (suggestions, if you will) to help me create joy, play more, and explore. Maybe I will add to this list or change it, but if it stays just the way it is for the rest of the year, that's perfectly fine.
Each week, I will strive to...
1. Get exercise and fresh air every day. Even if it is a 5-minute walk outside or a 5-minute yoga session in my basement - that counts. It's awesome if I go on that 5-mile run or take a 90-minute hot yoga class, but when I can't go or just don't feel like going, all is not lost. Just go outside and walk, or go downstairs and breathe and stretch.
2. Do something out of the ordinary. Maybe I will go to a different coffee shop, run a different route, or try a new food. Just do something that is different.
3. Do one task that I have been procrastinating. No task is too small. Hand washing that sweater that has sat at the bottom of my hamper for months counts.
4. Read something for pleasure every day. Whether it's a book or a blog, just read for fun - even if it's for 5 minutes or just one page.
5. Write something every day. It might just be a few sentences on a blog post, story, essay, or even brainstorming notes. Just write something.
6. Do something nice for my house. Maybe it's cleaning up an area of my house, rearranging furniture, or buying a new candle. Making my house cozy makes me happy, so do more of this.
7. Do something nice for me. Perhaps I'll take a bath, listen to music while I write, watch something I love, or go to a bookstore. Doing something that I enjoy rejuvenates me.
8. Do something nice for my family. Although I like to think I do this every day, being aware of small things that I can do that bring my husband and my daughter joy, makes me feel more joyful.
9. Learn something new. I love to read and look things up, so I probably do this already. But rarely do I take the time to really take things in. What if I explore just one thing a little more? What if I let the things that really interest me, the things that ignite those feelings of excitement and curiosity drive me to explore it more? Sometimes when we follow these interests, we get surprising results.
10. Allow myself to live in the moment. If a plan changes or a goal is not met, be okay with it. If the change in plans brings me happiness, let it go because that is how that moment was meant to unfold. If the change brings me stress or another negative feeling, try again. This time, a change may be necessary to get it right the next time, and that's okay. That means growth is happening.
11. Remember to play. Sometimes, when we are really creative, we can even make our work a variation of play. I want to have more fun - and maybe changing my attitude when I am doing certain things will help me.
12. Find something that brings me joy every day. No matter how small, take a moment to enjoy it. Maybe it's a sunrise, a hot cup of coffee in the afternoon, a good book, or an impromptu dance party in my living room with my daughter. Acknowledge the moment. Smile. Be joyful.
I am curious to see if these guiding ideas will help me create joy, play more, and explore. Living more curiously, taking life less seriously, and experiencing the simple joys in life...that is my goal.
Curiously,
Beth
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